Dear Uncle T, I hope this letter finds you in good spirits so that you may help me solve a very disturbing situation. I am 35-year-old-businessman who lives alone in a big mansion in Sandton, Johannesburg. Ever since I divorced with my wife 7 years ago, I have been living a miserable life of dating young girls and using my financial status to lure them into sleeping with me. Well, this time around karma decided to pay me a visit and I have to admit, it wasn’t a lovely one.
Two years ago, I met this beautiful, young model-look-alike girl who fell for every trick in my dodgy books, this one was far more different from the other girls, we shared a lot in common. At first, I told myself not to catch any feelings since she’s just one of those ‘’come and go’’ type of girls, but little did I know I was convincing myself otherwise. The way she does things is a lot different from the other young girls, she cooks, she cleans, she doesn’t ask me for money every day, and not to mention that she’s very good in the bedroom. Uncle T, this girl makes me feel young again, the way she’s so good, there was a time when I wanted to propose to her, but the evil side in me disagreed.
One day as we were sitting in my house sipping wine and cuddling near the fireplace, she started telling me more about her life and showing me pictures of her family. Among the stories, she told me that she doesn’t know her father because he left her mother when she was still young, this touched me deep because during my youth days, I once left a girl because I was afraid of taking responsibility for making her pregnant. So I asked her to show me pictures of her family…. As I was scrolling down the pictures on her phone, I gasped in shock of seeing a very familiar face, her mother!
Uncle T, her mother is the same woman I left when I was still young and naive, and to confirm the shocking discovery, the girl told me her mother’s name, oh God! I stood up and excused myself to the bathroom, when I got there, I burst into tears on thinking that the girl I am in love with, no man, the girl I have been sleeping with – is my daughter! Ever since that day, I have been avoiding her, avoiding her calls and keeping myself indoors because I feel like somebody pierced my heart with a sharp dagger. My daughter has been suffering all these years without me, to an extent that she even fell for a blesser, a blesser that is her biological father, lord forgive me!
I am appealing to you Uncle T to advise me on what I should do to solve this shameful problem, how do I look at my daughter next time I meet her, should I just keep my mouth shut and just dump her to ease my pain, or should I simply just resort to what my conscience tells me, kill myself? Please help! Anonymous – Sandton
Nobody disagrees with the fact that life is too short, but that does not simply mean we should take it into our own hands to shorten it! Greetings to you Anonymous and thank you for mailing in your concerns.
I love the universe because no matter how long it takes for a person to do wrong unto others, in the end, the same universe turns to unfold as it should. You can relate to what I’m saying because this situation is nothing but a lesson to you and the rest of the others out there who have the same mentality that you have. The way I see it, your daughter ended up mixing with older men because she has abandonment issues that were caused by your negligence.
But now the universe has given you a second chance to make things right by her, to stand up as a father and tell her the honest truth. This is not the time to feel sorry for yourself, this is not the time to think of abandoning her again by committing suicide, this is the time where you should start being a father more than a blesser. The difference between the two is that a father protects his princess from any harm, a father tells his princess the truth no matter bad the situation is, on the other hand, a blesser uses a princess and then leaves her for good, which one are you?
Among the things that I learned in life, there’s that one important one I always tell my clients, and that is; the truth can break a relationship, but in the end they understand. On the other hand, lies can build a relationship, but in the end they will hate you forever. I propose that you arrange a meeting with your daughter and tell her the truth, sit her down and apologies for all that you have caused her, tell her that you were absent as a coward, but now you are present as a father. After that, seek professional counselling for the both of you since your previous relationship might make it difficult for the both of you to live a normal life.
If she doesn’t accept your apology and proposal to be a father for her, the best thing you can do is protect her from a distance. I assure you that you will sleep peacefully at night knowing that you have done the right thing, cheers!
Uncle T’s advice ([email protected]) or call 071 5540119
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